As Im nearing the end of the 2nd of Trimester, Im getting more anxious, nervous and a little edgy on:
– How are we going to manage it all on our own?
– With another baby (Read Windows 8) getting ready for launch in the second half, how do I ensure that my passion for what I do doesn’t impact this life this life changing moment and vice versa?
I did talk about Que Sera Sera in my last post but then its easier said than done…isn’t it?
All my life, Ive been an independent sorta person…where most of my decisions have been taken by me independently…career, marriage et al….very different experience for a girl with Indian origin :)
So now, when the baby is due, Im kinda wondering would it have been better if I stayed with folks back home, with full family support (just like big Indian families have) or will I be able to manage on my own? Will the baby get the right upbringing without having the familiar circle of big family, friends, relatives etc etc?
I don’t know whats the right answer, but then I guess I have to try out on my own before I give up…!
We are digging deep into our pockets both literally as well as those of our friends….seeking support, help on help to manage the baby but then as they say, it will all happen when it happens..so crossing our fingers that it all happens well.
The other dilemma is my passion…passion to exceed and determination to do what Im supposed to do in the best possible way…
So the best way I thought was to share it with that one person who probably has an equal stake if not more in all of it…my boss :))
And after a lot of soul searching, I think he came with the best nugget of advice that cleared my mind completely….so yes Im passionate about the work, yes I wanna do the best…but then the child is mine and if God forbid anything was to happen will I ever be able to forgive myself? So at what cost?
That said the devil was laid to rest….passion will continue and its not going anywhere but then right now its time to enjoy the one thing that I wanted the most “Motherhood”!
Sometimes, all you need is a clear head, a nice chat and a great boss :)
PS: As I was writing this post, I left it in the middle as I became very tense, but now it seems there never was a problem…..such is life and such is the power of a good and meaningful conversation.